I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
