So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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