so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
So squirting runs in the family.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize