Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
