I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
