ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
They left me at home... I'm a liability
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
