Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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