i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
