listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
