She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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