bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
