So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
