Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
