..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
