are you so shy because you have an std?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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