check it out our google latitudes are spooning
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
