I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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