I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
