dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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