I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
