Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize