Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
