Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
