butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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