what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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