hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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