what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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