Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
