I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
