Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
