I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
