drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
