the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize