I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
