dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
