I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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