when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I cut my penus on the lid.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
