How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
