I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
