How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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