what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
