i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
