All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Randomize
