Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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