I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Success! We fucked roommates!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize