no one should ever give us hovercrafts
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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