Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
