Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
