Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
