Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Dignity is for republicans.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize