They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
